my testimony

Was on the bus with calyn. It was then when I realised that not many people know my testimony of how I came to know God and be in Hope Church. So here is my testimony, a way of remembering how God pursued me and to tell the world of His grace.

Everything dates back to when I was in p5. I was on my way home (with venetia). We were on our way to the mrt station when someone was giving out small booklets. Being kind, haha, I took a copy. Yes, it's those small booklets that relates the gospel and makes one wonder how many people ACTUALLY receive Christ through these booklets. I did. Haha. The young innocent Jessie read the booklet and decided to recite the sinner's prayer at the back of the booklet. So I'm technically a Christian.

A few nights later, during dinner, I told my mum that I wanna attend church. I thank God, on hindsight, that my parents are freethinkers. My mum was agreeable and found me a sunday school to attend. So started my sunday school days. Initially everything was exciting, fun and new. As the months go by, I start to give excuses to miss sunday school. I'm too tired after ballet lessons. It's raining. I'll go next week. When I was in p6, I decided to stop attending it altogether, giving God an excuse that I'll come back to Him when I'm in sec 1.

Of course I forgot about that promise, but God didn't. I've always wanted to get into st. nicks. Their cut-off point for that year was 251, and guess what? I got 250. So because of that one point I got into anderson, a school I've neither heard of nor seen. Two months into school, one day on my way home, I was approached by (how should I address her, a girl?) eelee. Haha. She got me to do a survey and then invited me for service that week. The amazing thing is that should I have gone to st. nicks, she wouldn't have approached me. And she wasn't intending to conduct a survey that day, but only because there's a visitor from a Hope Church overseas and she wanted to show her how we evangelise over here.

So I came service that week and rededicated my life. I was previously an insecure person, and very conscious about how others view me. Hence I'm very quiet, fearing that I may say the wrong thing and embarrass myself. God spoke to me about His unconditional love for me, and that my identity is ultimately a child of Him. I can be secure in Him, for He holds my future, and I need not feel inferior and be overly concerned with how others look at me, for He has created me unique and I should live to please the audience of One.

Many find it hard to believe that I was quiet in the past. I really was so! And God has indeed changed me. I strive, with my humanly efforts empowered by God's strength, to live my life for God. I'm still so, so, so imperfect. But I'll continue to hope in the Lord.